Guts

Guts

Literally, as in your colon. Yes, that nasty mushy fleshy thing that your poop passes through before exiting your body.

Actually no. I’m actually speaking about taking action void of mental conscience. This is one thing I seem to have the least of. It is both bad and good. I will start with the good bits first.

Sometimes, I do things on a whim and sometimes things that normally need some thought, I do it on an impulse which half the time has lead to some grief and humiliation. Oh wait, didn’t I say I will start with the good bits first? Right, yes.

Sometimes, I do things on a whim and sometimes things that normally need some thought, I do it on an impulse which half the time has lead to some much welcomed relief and happiness, even in the slightest.

Unfortunately, most of the time, I don’t do things on a whim and most of the time, choose to do the right thing even though no one will give me credit for it and often times, even piss off some people. Such was my former friendship with Albert and Jenny, such was the relationship with Cindy, such were the relationships with a myriad of love interests, potential friends with benefits, flings and lonely/frustrated wives.

Note that if my cousins are reading this, there is nothing to be proud of when it comes to having many many many many different intimate relationships. Indeed, some people require their entire lives to find someone they can settle down with, but even then, no one ever said people need to settle down at all. However, with that said, I can say with experience that if you tend to find someone who jumps from one to the next girl/guy every other week for a long long time, you can be sure that the person probably has a combination of insecurity and self esteem issues. Though I am also sure there are the tiny handful who live through life carelessly and none of which has to do with self esteem issues, but those are extremely rare. I admire people who can stick with a small handful of people over the course of their entire lives and work out their problems as partners, to find middle ground and still stay in love and communicate freely, than people who fuck everything that lands on their lap.

Anyway, so as I was saying, as I was riding my bike earlier around the neighborhood and saw many Chinese ethnic girls walking around in their tight tiny shorts and loose t-shirts either being playful or shy and snobbish (like me!), I was thinking that my biggest problem growing up was that I lacked guts. Then I proceeded to question myself, “What are guts?”

Well, “guts” is when a person either lacks or is indifferent to the mental anchor that holds them in place to think about the consequences of his/her actions of the moment. This honestly pisses me off.

In the past, I was indifferent and despite how I looked (which was skinny and ugly to some high school girls I knew, plus Laura did rate me a 1.5/10 back in 2003. Which makes me wonder what she rates me now. Probably a 1.864/10. ^_^), it wasn’t hard getting women. It was in fact, easy. It all came down to how things were communicated and what was communicated. Of course, when I was younger (despite what Laura would say), I did in fact believed that if I had Patrick’s looks, Albert’s brawn (not that he wasn’t intelligent) and my wits (I can’t put this any more humbly, I’m sorry), I could rule the world with my personal harem of women. Reminds me of something Thomas once said to me some years ago about his harem of women.

As I got older, this got worst but at the same time, a blessing that it did get worst when it comes to temptation. When I was riding my bike outside earlier this evening and saw all those Chinese girls bouncing around, I shook my head and thought of something something. Ultimately, I let out a sigh and came home to type this up.

That’s probably one big reason why I write Erotica and help women around the world orgasm to their delight without having to ever sleep with me. This is not a hint that I am a sex god. I am not. Though women in the past have mentioned they loved the way I touched them. *ponders* Again, this is not a hint I am a sex god. I really am not. If you want a sex god, you would probably find that off the streets somewhere outside a busy club or bar. When most women look at me, they usually look away in disgust and commit mental suicide.

Leave a Reply