Earthly Thoughts

About Beauty

I recently read an article about beauty and ugliness and found the following to be quite interesting. Author: Robert Tornambe, M.D. Source: CLICK HERE.


Listed below are five flawed personality traits that I believe can seriously affect the physical beauty of individuals. I have also included the opposite, positive traits that can enhance one’s beauty. Let’s see if you agree with my choices, and I certainly welcome any additional recommendations.

1) Conceitedness vs. Confidence

Conceited individuals are annoying because they have an excessively high opinion of their abilities, appearance and material things. These people like to show off and brag about their possessions and skills. They tend to be very rude, self-centered, arrogant and extremely insecure.

Confident people are aware of their attributes and do not have the need or desire to tell the world about them. They are comfortable in their own skin and never feel threatened by other individuals’ talents or accomplishments. Traits commonly found in confident people include eye contact during conversation; clear, audible speech patterns, without yelling; firm handshake; and tall, straight posture.

2) Grimness vs. Humorousness

I call this characteristic the “party-pooper trait,” as grim people seem to be unhappy or angry about everything. They complain and find fault in every person, place or thing and are just no fun to be around. These people are usually gloomy because they have not mastered the ability to be happy with themselves. They are not clinically depressed, just miserable.

Humorous, witty people are entertaining and fun. Often, their humor is self-effacing and good-natured when joking with others. They don’t try to be hurtful with their jokes. Humor can be used to defuse angry situations and is always helpful when making a first impression.

3) Selfishness vs. Honest Interest In Others

Selfishness denotes an excessive or exclusive concern with oneself and goes beyond normal self-interest or self-concern. These people demonstrate a disregard for others and openly express their need to devote all their energy to their own agenda. Selfish people have a great, inherent desire to control situations and people and are unwilling to reach compromises with others.

Individuals with honest interest in others are extremely likable. The interest must be genuine; otherwise the charade is obvious and offensive. They have the ability to coax people to talk about themselves or share interesting experiences. They are curious, ask questions and listen intently to the answers. They have the amazing ability to allow people around them to the feel important, a powerful attribute!

4) Cynicism vs. Optimism

These curmudgeons have a dim worldview. Their pessimistic nature often is linked to a failure to achieve personal goals. They are tiring because their cynical views can be depressing.

Optimists look at a difficult situation and realize that things can be much worse. Numerous studies have suggested that optimism is an effective tool in overcoming trauma, illness and depression. It is simply more desirable to spend time with positive individuals.

5) Narcissism vs. Healthy Vanity

Narcissists are like conceited individuals on steroids. They have an inflated sense of their own self-importance and the deep need for admiration. They monopolize conversations and have controlling personalities.

“Healthy vanity” is a positive trait in which a person has a realistically high self-esteem and is modestly confident. People with healthy vanity have a level-headed view of themselves, good and bad.

Each of these personality flaws can be changed or altered in a positive fashion. Doing so will make you a happier, more beautiful person… or should I say “less ugly”?

<--- So what percentages do you think you feel you are? For myself, I think: 1) Conceitedness = 1%, Confidence = 99% 2) Grimness = 0%, Humorousness = 100% 3) Selfishness = 50%, Honest Interest In Others = 50% 4) Cynicism = 30%, Optimism = 70% 5) Narcissism = 10%, Healthy Vanity = 90% For #1, I may not necessarily be completely confident about my abilities and I do tend to think I am not all that attractive in a physical sense, but for as far back as I can remember, I have always looked down on bragging about things excessively. I do tend to brag about certain things like how much gold I made in World of Warcraft to my friends who play the game, but beyond that, I keep quiet. Sometimes I may rant about a certain designer who does crap work and how he is in no position to boss me around, etc, but overall, I keep a pretty level head and feel I'm pretty humble in that respect. Patrick may disagree with me on #2 for having zero on Grimness because I tend to spout out how unhappy and miserable I am when I am drunk. There is a very deep aspect of my emotional core that brings me down into the pits of misery, but I don't deliberately dig into my core so I can spread my misery to others. I also tend to become 'The Devil's Advocate' when I feel someone has a tendency to only express one side of a story. Otherwise, I feel that I am quite 'balanced' in my beliefs. For #3, I have become this way, but I wasn't always like this. I was definitely much more interested in others than I am today, but the fact was that after awhile, everyone is generally the same and it gets repetitive in genuine interest. For #4, I am a mix of idealism, optimism and skepticism. I believe this sort of mix is a good balance of attaining realistic goals and outlooks. Otherwise, 100% optimism is a delusional trait. For #5, I'm primarily into Healthy Vanity, but I do tend to have a bit of Narcissism as well especially in written/typed literature. I tend to laugh 'with myself' when I re-read some of the debates I express. In other words, I adore most of my own super logical thinking and expressions, but beyond that, I pretty much have a balanced concept of myself. My close friends know that I am zero in controlling maniac. Though I'm sure Amber might have felt I was controlling in some aspects. I guess it really depends what we're talking about, but thus far, I feel I am definitely not a controlling individual.

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