Kith & Kin

Waterboarded by Rene

This is the first time I dreamt of having sex with Rene. Mind you, in my dream, she slobbered all over my face. It was the wettest kiss ever. She expelled so much saliva, that it felt like what I surmise could be the feeling of being waterboarded. While her tongue and lips were pretty graceful, the deluge of saliva almost mitigated my sexual arousal. Of course, this would be amazing if she was giving head.

[ponders thoughtfully]

Anyway, I met Rene way back in 2003 or 2004. So we’ve been friends for quite a long time. When I met her, she was still in high school. As the years went by, I caught glimpses of her growing up, initially cocooned by her upbringing and environment, innocent and naive of the world beyond her sight. In her 20’s, she spent her time finding herself and within that process, evolved from a caterpillar to a butterfly. Now in her mid 30’s, having been a country singer for the Daisy Dukes’ Band, and now, a full-time nurse, I had the pleasure of finally seeing her again, in all her glory and beauty. That was back in the morning of 2021, April 28th. She texted me on Whatsapp, then I called her on video chat, and we spend three and a half hours together. I even recorded our chat session, but unfortunately, accidentally deleted the video of her on the beach wearing a bikini, being drunk and playful. I remember she was lying on her stomach, or sitting down on her beach towel, constantly looking into her phone. We were smiling at each other and having a good time. She talked and talked and talked. A third of the time, it was about being enchanted by her bald anti-hero, whom she wants to rescue. Another third of the time was about us, being such long-time friends and how amazing that was. Then the last third was just her and I sharing our moments. She showed me her long thin vibrator she wears around her neck. Then I showed her my Fleshlight. She laughed and said it looked gross. I laughed with her and asked if she had seen her own pussy lately.


I don’t think I’ve ever had a crush on Rene though. She’s pretty, but more than that, she has a great personality. She’s bubbly, playful, funny, charming, and sexy. Also, she’s not political and she’s outside the realm of social disorder. In short, she’s all about, “you do you, and I’ll do me”, and here’s the thing, like my relationship with Patrick, Laura, Pepper, Pascale, and of course, Amber, political correctness is out the door. We get each other. So things that are normally triggering for society, will not affect us, because we get it. The only problem unfortunately, is that since I met her online nearly two decades ago, she has this one fault that is very obvious. She clearly lives in her own world. Meaning that whenever other people try to tell herno their story, whether that be about their day, their issues, their happenings, somehow, Rene will ‘hear it’ for about 30 seconds, then somehow, she will redirect the conversation back about herself. She was like this back when she was a teen, and she was like this when we were ‘hanging’ out on Whatsapp on April.

You might be wondering then, how is it possible she was a great personality, when she always turn the conversation to be about her? Well, if we’re talking about anything but ourselves, like our hobbies, things unrelated to ourselves, sex, movies, etc, then that ping pongs fantastically. However, when we start talking about personal stuff like our own relationships, Rene will give me her attention for about 30 seconds, then she will steer the conversation back to her own relationships. It happens 100% of the time without fail. I wonder if any of her other friends and family members are aware of this or have mentioned it to her.

Rene has admitted that we don’t talk with each other enough. Literally, besides being penpals initially, we shoot messages to each other very randomly throughout the years. Most of the time, in her adult years, the times we spoke on the phone, or on Skype, was because she was going through a heartbreak and I was there to hear her out, cheer her on, etc. While she might have been curious about my personal relationships, again, her attention span towards my personal life lasts less than a minute.

Also, another irritation I have with her, is that she literally ghosts me. So while Amber may have a fondness for Rene, at the end of the day, our friendship is good when it’s active. Since it’s not active 99.9% of the time, our friendship is pretty much non-existing. I think if we lived close to each other, things would be different, but I don’t really know.

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Leemanism is about my views, my thoughts, and my feelings with as little filtering as possible. These concepts are not reflected in the people I value and are associated with. People who accept me, adhere to the parts where we are compatible and tolerate the parts where we are not. So however people perceive me to be, ultimately it obviously doesn't mean the friends I mention in this blog are the same as me. It means it's possible they are similar or the same, as well as different than me. It is highly unusual for people to be completely compatible with each other.

With that out of the way, and to make things clear, I never said I am a good person, nor am I trying to be one, though I would rather live with the empathetic than with the cruel. I would not deliberately do harm. I rather stand up against injustice than to pretend it doesn't exist. However, I understand consequences. The police is there to enforce the law, but not deter crimes from happening. Which means people must do what they must do to protect themselves, before the law of the land takes over and even then, the law of the land isn't there to protect you. It's there to protect the general consensus. Even if you may be right, society may deem you wrong - even most of your friends may side with society, than protect you. The law will almost always side with society.

We are few. Stay safe. (•̀ᵥᵥ•́)