3:07am

Indeed it is. 8]

What’s up with the lack of updates? It has been hasn’t it? Since I use to enter one to three every day or so. Well, times have changed, or rather, the mood have changed.

The last few weeks have been quite mellow. Nothing much has happened. I’m just kind of waiting on the programmers to do their thing and get back to me. I’ve also been playing a lot of World of Warcraft and bit of C&C3 Tiberian War – yes got it 2 days after I ordered it from EA. I’ll have some pics up for that, if Jon decides to get a copy later. I also haven’t been out much and when I do, it’s usually for a very long time. I just walk around and visit places where I’ve been to – usually places that I’ve been to when I was a kid. I still live in the city I grew up in.

[“Now We Are Free” by Enya]

I feel that on the surface, I am turning into a real gaming nerd of sorts. I don’t have the will to cycle any more, nor go to the gym or do anything like that, though mind you, I do fantasize about it. It’s funny because every time I open the garage and start the van up for my meeting out in Vancouver, I would take a long look at my bike and think of all the times I’ve ridden with it. It’s a good bike with good memories, even the bloody ones. 8]

So it’s 3:30am right now, and I remember I created a song or an album back in 2000 named after this time. What happened that night many years ago? I don’t remember that much, but I feel it was quite mellow, kind of like now, except I was 250 times wealthier and I had a good amount of assets, and a girl whom I adored very much. Ah well, like that conversation with Jon a couple of months ago when the topic of curiosity and regret came up – today I have to say that I do indeed regret quite a few things. There had been a time when I said I never regretted anything, but today, I can say I was lying to myself, or at the least, denying myself that past history lesson.

Being curious is something I would have felt if I didn’t do it and the result was still neutral or positive, but regretting it is because I did something and that lead to other things that ended negatively. So I sit here, my thoughts, mainly to myself, no booze and only warm water, listening to “Now We Are Free” by Enya. If Albert thought I was free of burden, he wasn’t all right nor all wrong. I am free to think and do on my own terms because I choose to. If I was afraid of how others may look at me, or how the world would ridicule me, etc, etc, I wouldn’t have chosen to be this a long time ago. Then again, I am human and because I am human, I am still afraid. We’re all afraid to some degree – whether that be true fear, embarrassment or some other thing, we are whatever we are that everything else forces us to do to some degree.

The other week, I saw 300 the movie. It was and is an excellent movie with another ‘tragic’ Frank Miller ending. I didn’t like Sin City, as much as it was a great movie, it was just not my thing. However, 300 is awesome. To balance it out, I am giving We Were Soldiers an 8.5/10 and 300 a 9.5/10.

On that note and completely unrelated, I finally paid off my entire credit card balance that had been haunting me since mid 2003 when I spent my first $400 on my bike – oh yeah, it’s that ‘old’. 8] Unfortunately, it now has an extra $250 on it cuz of three new Harry Potter books I ordered from Chapters and four months paid in advance for my Fido plan.

This summer, my cousin Brandon will be coming back for more sleep-overs, and by then, the weather will be a lot better. So we can go for a bit of biking, and I’ll introduce him to Aunty Jenny and Aunty Laura. Hahahaha… How do you like that?! We’re all not married yet, so I guess he can just call you two Jenny and Laura, or Jenny Jeh Jeh and Laura Jeh Jeh. 8]

Anyway, so biking, some gaming, he’s probably too old for playground now, though he used to love the playground – that was really fun. Hmm… What else? He’s too short for hoops. I don’t know, probably take him to the Aquarium. So I’m looking forward to that again.

Recently, I started to get back into tracking, but it’s so new to me again. Patrick asked me to do some music with him for our Agent Loop duo. Still getting accustomed to Reason! So please be patient, and yes I am bad at replying to emails. I haven’t forgotten you. I am just trying to clear out my replies from the beginning. BTW, Pat, Erica finally emailed me back. I think you should come back to Vancouver now… Hahaha… 8]

Pat’s dad called me the other day for some stuff and drinking, and he mentioned that the vid Pat made of me taking a dump has now been seen 1.2 million times. Oh great.

8]

Ah, this is a good song.

Good night everyone. 8]

3:45am