Thoughtful Nutmeg

Rejection

dangok

This creature is known as a “Pong” because I’ve been trying to sleep most of the morning with little success and cannot think up a better name than “Dangok”. 8P

Which also means, I skipped work today because around 6:30 this morning, I suddenly woke up to a very painful stomach ache and spent a good two hours trying to clear that up on top of the two hours I tried to go back to sleep, shivering from the cold, which mind boggled me. I could not figure out why I was so cold.

So I had a dream this morning, as I finally fell back asleep and I think it’s good to document it because it stood out… Not that most of my dreams don’t stand out vividly, but well…

The dream was way longer and more detailed than this, but basically, I was on a beach at a pine forest cove. I was with a girl of Asian-ethnicity. She had long wavy black hair, a strong sure-look combined with a feminine personality and on the surface, she did not look suitable for me coinciding social protocols and standards. Beyond the surface, we connected in a mature and lovable way.

There was also another girl on the beach, some ways off to the side. She had shorter hair, a cute round face, more petite and less curvy and her personality was quirky. For some reason, I rejected the first girl and went after this one.

As my dream ‘washed away’ my past, that second girl took me onto another journey. Yet, at the back of my mind, I felt as though I gave up a lot to go with someone or something that may not actually be what I really want.

On the surface, this dream may seem like it is talking about women, but I feel it represents much more than that.

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Disclaimer

Leemanism is about my views, my thoughts, and my feelings with as little filtering as possible. These concepts are not reflected in the people I value and are associated with. People who accept me, adhere to the parts where we are compatible and tolerate the parts where we are not. So however people perceive me to be, ultimately it obviously doesn't mean the friends I mention in this blog are the same as me. It means it's possible they are similar or the same, as well as different than me. It is highly unusual for people to be completely compatible with each other.

With that out of the way, and to make things clear, I never said I am a good person, nor am I trying to be one, though I would rather live with the empathetic than with the cruel. I would not deliberately do harm. I rather stand up against injustice than to pretend it doesn't exist. However, I understand consequences. The police is there to enforce the law, but not deter crimes from happening. Which means people must do what they must do to protect themselves, before the law of the land takes over and even then, the law of the land isn't there to protect you. It's there to protect the general consensus. Even if you may be right, society may deem you wrong - even most of your friends may side with society, than protect you. The law will almost always side with society.

We are few. Stay safe. (•̀ᵥᵥ•́)