Thoughtful Nutmeg

Why do I keep going…

…when no one comments on my blog entries anymore?

It’s easy. I actually get about 150,000 unique hits per month on average. You may wonder how I am doing that without any ads. Well, I could probably make a couple of hundred dollars if I had ads up on my blog, but the biggest thing is that I have a lot of blabbering content. I get visitors and I have found that some bits and pieces of my blog entries get routed around the net.

Awhile ago, I happened upon a Russian forum post that linked to one of my entries. It was quite fantastic. Some random strangers had also emailed me for various things by reading some of my entries and think that I am some sort of emotional genius who was able to relay my thoughts and emotions across quite nicely.

Well, it’s all thanks to my constant posting. I’ve deleted posts over the years of course to clean things up. Most of the things I deleted were religious and political rants. With all the stuff I’ve deleted, combined with what I have now, it added up to roughly 600 entries. Minus the deleted stuff, I have just over 400 entries since March 2006.

It’s quite a feat. Most blogger quit within the first 3 months because they don’t get enough people commenting on their blog or that they simply outgrow the idea of it.

Take Jonathan and Laura. They’ve tried for a bit. Jon had a blog for a few months and stopped updating. Laura had a Xanga blog for most of her Taiwan experience, in which I kept in touch with until she finally stopped updating that. So far, of all the people I know that had blogs, I am the only one who has an ongoing one for 1.5 months short of five years. I already have my domain name registered for life (not really), so I intend to keep blogging until…

Who knows?

What’s my real secret on what motivates me? Honestly, it’s me. More accurately, it’s the inner me + random moments of booze and good music.

The first time I heard this song (Cyber Bird)…


…my entire spirit was lifted and I knew in that instance that the feeling would subside very soon. So I tried my best to release myself and soak up the feeling as much as possible. When that feeling finally and ended, my heart went back to ‘normal’ and in the depths of my mind, I visualized that beautiful me disappearing into the fathomless reaches of soul.

I want to say I miss that feeling, but I can’t because I don’t. I don’t any more.

1 thought on “Why do I keep going…

  1. That reminds me of that little conversation we had about how we used to create things with what we absorbed from our surroundings.

    Congrats to your success either way. I am almost jealous ;D

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


Leemanism is about my views, my thoughts, and my feelings with as little filtering as possible. These concepts are not reflected in the people I value and are associated with. People who accept me, adhere to the parts where we are compatible and tolerate the parts where we are not. So however people perceive me to be, ultimately it obviously doesn't mean the friends I mention in this blog are the same as me. It means it's possible they are similar or the same, as well as different than me. It is highly unusual for people to be completely compatible with each other.

With that out of the way, and to make things clear, I never said I am a good person, nor am I trying to be one, though I would rather live with the empathetic than with the cruel. I would not deliberately do harm. I rather stand up against injustice than to pretend it doesn't exist. However, I understand consequences. The police is there to enforce the law, but not deter crimes from happening. Which means people must do what they must do to protect themselves, before the law of the land takes over and even then, the law of the land isn't there to protect you. It's there to protect the general consensus. Even if you may be right, society may deem you wrong - even most of your friends may side with society, than protect you. The law will almost always side with society.

We are few. Stay safe. (•̀ᵥᵥ•́)